How to make those Mexican Timeshare Spiels work for You

I always make a point of stopping at the local tourist office when arriving at a new destination, but I was puzzled when I and my travel companion were directed to one of about 20 free-standing desks at Cancun’s airport, manned by a smiling man named Isaac. He gave us a map, sold us tickets for the Super Shuttle to our hotel and then asked whether we’d like to earn 2,000 pesos (slightly more than USD$100) for attending a 90-minute presentation for a new property being built in nearby Villa del Palmar. Someone would pick us up at our hotel in the morning; all we had to do was pay a $20 deposit to prove we would uphold our part of the bargain. Heck, he would even throw in free breakfast at the property and transportation back to the airport in two days so we could continue our way to Cuba. This was my introduction to Mexican timeshare spiels. In fact, I had never participated in one in my life.

The Cancun Mexican Timeshare Spiel

That’s when I learned the value of having a companion who could play the part of a doubtful, reluctant participant, which came easily to my friend. But then Isaac upped it to 2,500 pesos, and since we had nothing planned the next day but a lazy beach afternoon and also really nothing to lose except maybe that $20, I convinced him we should give it a try.

Of course, being timed-share virgins, that night we had our misgivings. We could be robbed! We could be kidnapped! So I made the hotel clerk write down our names in case we never came back. He laughed, obviously amused at our newbie status, and asked whether we had three hours to spare because that’s how long it would actually last, thereby giving us some sense of relief. The driver did indeed pick us up the next morning at the appointed time, then drove 100km an hour in a 70km zone, which, despite the cross hanging from his rear-view mirror, led us to then worry about dying on the road.

After a mediocre breakfast, we were delivered to a young woman from Canada, who seemed sincerely surprised that this was our first time-share experience and then showed us the most expensive suite, followed by a couple of average rooms. After, in a conference room, were told that this wasn’t really a timeshare (no, those were bad!) but rather the opportunity to buy into some kind of club for about $9,000 to $34,000, depending on the level of participation, plus a yearly fee, for the privilege of staying at properties all over the world.

A bald man joined us for the hard sell, claiming to be from Kansas City when we said we were from Kansas. After asking how much we’d been paid to come, he frowned at the amount and told the young woman to follow up on that, hoping, perhaps, to guilt us into signing up. We learned that about 60 to 80 people each day are corralled for this property’s spiel and that 80,000 people had signed up for membership since 1983. On our way out, our young guide confided that she’d known right away that we weren’t going to be one of them. I didn’t know whether to miffed or relieved.

In any case, three hours after we’d left our hotel the ordeal was over. We were given the 2,500 pesos plus our $20 deposit and put in a van for the trip back. Joining us were two Mexican women, who told us that they’d been paid 2,800 pesos to attend, obviously more seasoned at this game than us.

The Cozumel Timeshare Spiel

So when I later flew to Cozumel to meet two girlfriends, I was only briefly surprised to find the same setup for Mexican timeshare spiels at the airport there. Being a veteran, I knew my friends’ suspicions were a bargaining tool. This time was slightly different, however, as we had to pay $100 upfront in return for a taxi from the airport to our Airbnb; the round-trip ferry from Cozumel to Playa Carmen where we would tour the Occidental Vacation Club and have an excellent breakfast buffet we gladly would have paid $15 for apiece; the collectivo onward to Tulum plus entrance to the Mayan ruins; and, on Cozumel, a two-day car rental and entrance to Punta Sur nature park. In the end, that $100 investment paid for about $225 worth of stuff, making it, in my opinion, a fairly good return on about 2.5 hours of our time.

Of course, not everyone wants to spend one iota of time on a hard-earned vacation looking at luxury properties that, let’s face it, with the exception, perhaps, of tropical foliage, resident parrots, and views of the Caribbean Sea, could be anywhere. Now that my curiosity has been satisfied, I’m not sure I’d do it again, either (though I have to admit, that damn curiosity has made me do all kinds of crazy things).

As for all those tourists participating in Mexican timeshare spiels, you might wonder who actually pays for them to come have a look? My guess? Those who have bought into the timeshare spiel.

For more on Mexico, see my blogs on Mexico’s Guanajuato and San Miguel de Allende and Tooling around Tulum’s Maya Ruins, as well as my article on Cozumel in gettingontravel.com